Elopement Planning Tips: How To Write Your Own Wedding Vows With Intention
Crafting your own wedding vows adds a personal touch and ensures an unforgettable day. Despite feeling like a daunting task amidst all your wedding preparations, figuring out how to write your own wedding vows will undoubtedly be worth it for the memories you’ll cherish in years to come.
Baring your heart in front of the love of your life allows you to celebrate, and be celebrated in this unique journey. It’s a chance to share your promise for the future, express your love, and solidify your commitment to each other.
If you’ve ever considered writing your own but find yourself wondering, “How should vows be written with intention?” Let me guide you in just how you can do that!
A Guide To Wedding Vows
When it comes down to writing your vows, it’s important to recognize that there’s no one-size-fits-all mold. Every couple is unique, and the words should reflect that. From marriage priorities to their beliefs, ideals, and expectations, each couple will have their own perspective.
There are countless ways to write your wedding vows, but what’s the best way? The one that works for you both! Researching different styles can help you discover what suits you best. However, before you start writing, it’s helpful to ask each some important questions:
How long should the vows be?
Aim to have a similar time frame for your vow reading. Averagely they should be a minute or two and It’s best to focus on quality over quantity.
Do you want to incorporate traditional elements or religious vows?
Consider if you want to incorporate any hymns, prayers, or traditional wording in your vows.
How serious do you want the tone to be?
Comedic, lighthearted vows with inside jokes, to sentimental words? Or perhaps a bit of both?
What kind of format should our vows be?
Think about whether your vows should be a promise, a love letter, or a poem. Both your vows should complement each other.
Elopement planning tip: Answering these questions early on will give an insight into each other’s thoughts and help you create vows that flow together seamlessly instead of feeling disjointed.
How To Write Personal Wedding Vows
Traditional wedding vows are often quite structured and don’t let you say everything you want to the person you love. While some couples will stick to traditions by repeating the officiant’s words, writing your own vows can be extra special.
From deeply reflecting on your relationship to sharing your unique love story and making personal promises, these vows feel intentional, resulting in a far more heartfelt and intimate ceremony.
Stuck thinking “How do you write your own wedding vows with intention?” and eager to know where to start? Here are a few tips on how to craft meaningful vows that capture the essence of you as a couple.
Reflect On Your Relationship
I have worked with some couples who have come up with exceptionally creative ideas for wedding vows, leaving a lasting impression. Those couples all shared one common trait: their vows were authentic.
Think back to how you met and reflect on your journey together. Have a big brain dump of all the adventures you’ve shared and the milestones you’ve reached, both big and small.
“Patrick, we met as teenagers, both on a journey of self-discovery and exploration. We’ve shared so many firsts, and now we stand here about to embark on another exciting chapter in our shared story”
Be Personal
It might sound obvious but make sure the vows sound like you. Don’t just copy and paste, use language that flows naturally and ensure your words are heartfelt. Remember, they don’t have to be elaborate or fancy — simple elopement vows hold just as much sentiment.
You could include special memories, something you admire about them, or share inside jokes that mean something to you both. But keep each other and any guests in mind when writing, as some things can be kept private.
“I remember seeing you across from the bar and knew I had to meet you. I tried to play it cool but ended up tripping over a barstool. You were a true gentleman, helping me up with a smile. Since that moment, our life has been full of laughter and love”
Your Promises To Them
The promises you make are the cornerstone of your vows, shaping them into unique wedding vows that reflect both of you. Consider what you want to promise to your partner now and in the future. These promises are a declaration of love and commitment to supporting each other. Aim to list three to six meaningful promises.
“I feel like the luckiest man alive, choosing to spend the rest of my life with you has been the easiest decision of my life. To my best friend, my travel buddy, my partner in crime, I promise to fill our days with laughter, to encourage and comfort you, and be your biggest cheerleader for the rest of our lives…”
Be Prepared
Don’t leave your vows to the last minute — you don’t want that unnecessary stress! Creativity takes time, so write in stages, edit, and refine. Plan to have it completed a few weeks before the wedding so you can practice saying them out loud and smooth out any kinks.
Not everyone has a talent for public speaking, and that’s totally ok. If you don’t want to read them out in front of guests, there are options to have a private vow reading before the ceremony or exchange letters before you walk down the aisle — there is absolutely no pressure!
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Remember, there is no right or wrong way to write your vows – do whatever feels best and resonates with you and your partner. By following these tips for writing your own vows, you’ll be able to let your love shine through your words.
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